The grammar of wordplay

Czech morphology is regular and productive enough to be played with. Czechs decline brand names, turn English verbs into aspect pairs within weeks, and use suffixes to mock. Understanding the play takes the grammar; producing it is one of the last skills a learner acquires.

Everything declines

A foreign name that fits a Czech pattern is declined like a Czech word: na Facebooku, s Googlem, bez iPhonu, v Tescu. Names that fit no pattern are left alone in writing (v McDonald's) and get a Czech nickname in speech (v Mekáči). Foreign women's surnames usually take -ová, with results that amuse Czechs themselves: Angelina Jolieová.

Even nonsense declines. The best-known Czech Jabberwocky, Jaroslav Císař's Žvahlav, opens Bylo smažno, lepě svihlí tlové... Every Czech reader knows at once that tlové are masculine animate creatures in the plural and that svihlí agrees with them. English needs "the slithy toves" for that; Czech gets the grammar from the endings alone.

Loan verbs get aspect

Imperfective	Perfective	English
googlit	vygooglit	to google
lajkovat	lajknout	to like a post
sdílet	nasdílet	to share

The new verb slots straight into the system: -nout makes a one-off action, a prefix makes a completed one. Vygoogli mi to is as natural as Najdi mi to.

Prefixes as a joke machine

Take one colloquial verb, kecat (to chatter), and let the prefixes work: ukecat (to talk someone into something), vykecat (to blab a secret), rozkecat se (to get chatting and not stop), nakecat (to talk rubbish). Speakers coin new combinations on the spot and listeners decode them from the prefix: dovysvětlit (to finish explaining), Docvaklo mi to (the penny finally dropped).

Diminutives that bite

Diminutives are affectionate by default: pivečko, chlebíček, hrníček kafe. Attach one to a profession or an official and it turns into contempt: úředníček (a petty clerk), básníček (a poetaster). Whether To je ale počasíčko! praises the weather or curses it depends on the weather and on the intonation; the suffix itself is neutral.

What English speakers miss

• Leaving declinable brands undeclined: *Jsem na Facebook → Jsem na Facebooku. Location needs the locative; na Facebook is the accusative of direction, "onto" (dát fotku na Facebook).
• Reading every diminutive as sweet: calling a colleague's report a zprávička belittles it.
• Translating puns word for word: Czech wordplay usually lives in endings and prefixes, which English does not have.